I know the feeling. It’s extremely difficult, and I certainly don’t doubt that. But it’s taking that first step to fight the thoughts that are causing you to want you to hurt yourself. Learn how you can respond to them in a different way. Write, watch a movie, exercise, talk to a friend, read, play an instrument, etc. Unfortunately, if you keep allowing yourself to cut, it’s never going to get any easier. You have to teach yourself how to lead a life without it. You are stronger than you think, I promise.